How easy it is to
neglect goal-setting in our family life- especially in the spiritual area. We set financial goals, scholastic goals,
even weight goals. But how easy it is to
neglect spiritual goals.
Four questions
often come to mind...
1.
Is it appropriate to set goals in the
spiritual area of life?
When
Jesus challenged his disciples to "count the cost", He encouraged
careful planning…
Lk
14:28-32
"For
which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the
cost, whether he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a
foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, 30
saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish.’ 31 Or
what king, going out to encounter another king in war, will not sit down first
and deliberate whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes
against him with twenty thousand? And if not, while the other is yet a great
way off, he sends a delegation and asks for terms of peace."
Proverbs
15:22 Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.
We
could ask, "Does cause and effect work in the spiritual area of
life?" Charles Finney, the famous American evangelist in the mid- 19th
century, asserted that "just as God has built cause and effect into the
natural world, it also exists in the spiritual world, and possibly even more
reliably." We often call this principal "sowing and reaping".
2 Co 9:6 Now
this I say, he who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows
bountifully will also reap bountifully.
Careful planning
and prayer often lead us to take further actions that help ensure the final
goal we are shooting for. When we set
spiritual goals for our family those goals become targets for our faith and
obedience. "Failing to plan is
planning to fail" applies in all areas of life, especially the spiritual
areas.
2.
How can we set spiritual goals for
others (children, spouse, and family)?
Obviously,
you have a greater capacity to control goals for yourself than for others.
But doesn't a goal basically become a prayer request for them, when mixed
with faith. As we set goals for family members it often prompts us to
create an environment that will foster growth. If our goal is that they
are well-versed in Scripture, we are more likely to emphasize Scripture reading
and Scripture memory in our everyday lives. The same is true for worship,
prayer, giving, servanthood, etc.
Proverbs
22:6
Train
up a child in the way he should go;
even
when he is old he will not depart from it.
3.
What types of goals might be
appropriate in the spiritual realm?
The
best goals in the Christian life are those related to our overall growth in
Christ. They would involve character as well as spiritual practices and
activities.
You may
have heard the term "Profile of a Disciple". What would a
person in their age and stage of life look like when they are fully
discipled? For instance, what would a
fully discipled junior high, high school, college, young adult, married with
family, middle aged, or senior look like.
It would look different at various ages and stages. As we consider these profiles we will get
insights for worthy goals for development and growth.
A good
profile will be realistic. We are not talking about sinless perfection,
but realistic discipleship and its outcomes. It will also address a
variety of life issues, not only the typical spiritual ones. How a
teenage boy handles his sexuality is a strong indicator of his walk with
Christ; the same for how a middle-aged man handles his finances.
Family
values also play a big part in creating a "profile". If
"reconciling our differences with others" is a huge value in our
family, then certainly as the children mature, you want to see evidence that
they are "getting it". Are they taking meaningful steps to
forgive one another that is appropriate for their age? What will be the
evidence of this trait emerging? What will we be looking for?
4.
Can we set a goal like, "that my brother
will come to Christ"?
Some
people really struggle with this question. It may feel a bit presumptuous
to set a goal like this. Before we discard it, consider the many passages
that demonstrate God's heart for the lost:
Matthew
18:14 "So it is not the will of my Father who is in heaven that one of
these little ones should perish."
II
Peter 3:9 The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count
slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but
that all should reach repentance.
I
Timothy 2:3 This is good, and it is pleasing in the sight of God our Savior,
who desires all people to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth.
It is
entirely appropriate and necessary for godly parents to pray and plan towards
their little ones coming to faith. Likewise, we want to be diligent to
pray for brothers, sisters, parents, and extended family members.
In
conclusion, resist the temptation toward foggy thinking when it comes to
setting goals for the spiritual development of your family. Be much in
prayer, discuss and dream about what you would like yourself and others to look
like several years from now. Establish some short-term goals which will
help you create an environment for growth in these areas. Set the pace
for your family with your own love and devotion for Christ and expect great
things down the road.
Ephesians
3:20 Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask
or think, according to the power at work within us,
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